Commentary - A Fairytale In Five Drabbles

[deird_lj]

So, I asked for fic commentary requests. (I’m still happy to do more, if anyone’s interested.)

This was written for silveronthetree, who requested a commentary for A Fairytale In Five Drabbles. You should probably read that before looking at this commentary.

The original fic still looks like it did, and my notes are the bits in blockquotes.



A Fairytale In Five Drabbles

(It says “once upon a time” at the start of every section. That’s how you tell it’s a fairytale.)

Soul Mates

The “soul” bit’s because this section’s about Angel.

Once upon a time, there was a girl who killed the killers.

Watch the way the description of Buffy changes in each section. (I was rather proud of it.) Here, she’s purely a Slayer. And a fairly normal one, too.

And she met a man who wasn't exactly a man.

…because he’s a vampire.

And she fell in love with him.

He was handsome, and he brooded quite adorably.

Anyone who can’t pick up on the fact that it’s Angel, just from that line, really isn’t paying attention.
I really love mentioning Angel brooding – it tends to come up in my fic quite a lot…

And he wanted to show her how much she meant to him.

I am very much of the opinion that what Angel does throughout the second half of season 2 would be best summarised as “a very twisted form of love”…

So he killed some fish, and sent her flowers, and tortured her mentor, sketched her portrait, played some opera music, and promised to love her til the end of the world.

Willow’s fish, in Passion, the roses in Bewitched Bothered and Bewildered, Giles in Becoming, the pictures in Passion, and the opera music playing in Giles’ house after Jenny is killed in Passion.
(Which are all things that happened when he didn’t have a soul.)

The final item on the list is there for two reasons: firstly because he really did love her, but mainly because “the end of the world” is, in my mind, referring to the whole Acathla debacle – so that’s Angel, still soulless, calling her “lover” on the night the world’s going to end…

But she put a sword through his chest, so he left town and became a detective.
Which was deeply tragic.

It was rather tragic, but I absolutely love the fact that summing up three whole seasons that fast just makes the whole thing seem so comical – especially once I say, very seriously, just how Deeply Tragic it is.

Stupid Choice

Parker. (Who else?)

The titles are all two words, with the first initial being “S”. That happened pretty much by accident – I figured out the titles for Angel, Riley, and Spike, and then noticed the pattern.

Once upon a time, there was a girl who saved the world.

…which happened in Becoming, when she stabbed Angel.

And she met a perfect guy who wasn't exactly perfect.

Parker, who seems so wonderfully perfect on the surface.

And she could have fallen in love.

But he didn't use the telephone enough. And he followed his id. And he wasn't really deep and damaged - he was only pretending.

The “telephone” is about the montage in Harsh Light of Day when Buffy kept checking her messages, to see if he’d rung yet… which, of course, he hadn’t.
Willow calls him “id boy” in Beer Bad, which she says is the reason he’s purely interested in manipulating girls into sex.
And he managed to seduce Buffy by “playing the sensitive lad”, as Spike calls it.

So she drank some magic beer, and she saved his life, and bashed him on the head.
And then she walked away.

(Beer Bad.)

And she forgot him.
And he forgot her (the bastard).

I was two words short on the 100. And I’m so glad I was, because that two word comment has become my favourite line in the entire fic.

And an undercover soldier punched him in the face.
Which was completely justified, and pretty funny.

Riley, in The Initiative. (And good for Riley! *cheers*)

State Farm

A Xander quote: “Dependable? What is he, State Farm?”
…said about Riley in Into The Woods.

Once upon a time, there was a girl who was peculiar.

Riley’s summary of Buffy, in The Initiative.

And she met a normal college boy who wasn't exactly normal.

…being an undercover soldier, and all.

And she would not fall in love.

I think Xander’s right – Buffy could have fallen in love with Riley if she’d let herself. But Parker was the icing on the cake of Angely-badness… and that pretty much made Buffy determined not to be that vulnerable again.

She put her heart inside a box, and he tried so hard to find it.
He talked about cheese, threatened a handsome vampire, rescued a werewolf, took her to a secret base, and paid a girl to suck his blood.
But nothing worked.

The “cheese” pickup line is from The Initiative, the “handsome vampire” being threatened is Angel, from The Yoko Factor, the werewolf is Oz, in New Moon Rising, the secret base is the Initiative, and the girl sucking his blood is from season 5.

One day she opened up the box, and took her heart out again.
But she wasn't good at chasing helicopters, so he left her alone.
Which was inevitable.

(A fairly adequate summary of the end of Into The Woods.)

Seething Hatred

Spike quote: “I came to you in friendship! Well… okay, seething hatred, but the point is…”

Once upon a time, there was a girl who died quite tragically.

That being at the end of The Gift.

And she met a vampire who wasn't exactly a vampire.

…because of the chip.

And he fell in love with her.

And he tried to kill her, left her flowers, chained her to the wall, and promised to love her til the end of the world.
And he built shrines, effigies, and robots in her honour.

The flowers are from Forever, chaining her to the wall is from Crush, as is the “shrine”, the robot is the Buffybot, and trying to kill her and promising to love her are both things Spike does on a weekly basis.

Then they knocked down a house together.

(Smashed.)

And one day he came back from Africa.

…with a soul.

And she fell in love with him.

Please note: the only references to Buffy loving someone are about Angel and Spike. I wanted to be very clear that the two of them were pretty much equal, as far as Buffy was concerned.

But he burst into flames, and saved the world.
Which was really sucky timing.

Which brings us to the end of Chosen.

Slayer's Boy

Spike refers to Xander as this in Same Time Same Place.

Once upon a time, there was a girl who changed the world.

…which happened in Chosen.

And she met a pirate who served her faithfully.

Because he has an eye-patch!

And she fell in love with everyone else.

But he waited. Quite patiently.

Remember how I mentioned that the two references to Buffy loving someone are about Spike and Angel? Well, I never say that she falls in love with Xander.
I also never say that Xander is in love with her…

The brooding and the british had gone into law.

(A Wolfram & Hart reference.)

The soldier was in the jungle. And also married.
The other was... much best forgotten.

We have no idea what’s happened to Parker – but, really, does anyone care?

Still the pirate waited.

And one day she turned to him, and she said,
“Where have you been all this time? And why didn't I notice earlier?”

And they are hoping to live happily ever after.
So far, they've managed two years.

Fairytales have to end with “happily ever after”. It’s the rule.
But I didn’t want to make it a “definitely, for all time, absolutely” thing, because I’m very into ambiguous endings for Buffy and romance. So I left it at “trying”…

Comments

[lavastar.livejournal.com]

Oh, this is so cute! I'd forgotten about this fic - it's really quite adorable, and all the little things you did with the style are really, really cute. Especially the way you phrase things.


Time for your daily French lesson, btw.

RULE NUMBER ONE:

If you forget what a word in French is, Frenchify the English version or say it in a French accent! You're probably right anyways! And French people won't notice if you're wrong, because half of their words ARE like that!

Or use a synonym: "to watch or look at" is "regarder", as in "regard".

[deird1]

Glad you liked this!



(Oooh... French stuff...)

[lavastar.livejournal.com]

RULE NUMBER TWO: Everything has a gender. And you have to use articles that express the gender and number (singular or plural) pretty much all the time.

There's direct articles - le (masculine singluar), la (feminine singular), and les (feminine or masculine plural). And if it starts with a vowel and isn't plural, it's l'. That's like saying "the" in English.

And there's indirect articles - un (masculine singular), une (feminine singular), and des (feminine or masculine plural). That's like saying "a" or "an" in English.

And remember: if you can't remember what the gender is, who the fuck cares! The important thing to remember about French is that French people themselves don't know how to speak it correctly.

But a usually good rule of thumb is looking at the ending of the word. If it ends in something like "-ette", "-elle", or "-che", it's probably feminine. Except for the 54930584 cases where it's not.

[louise39.livejournal.com]

Five fine fairtylale affairs in drabbles [I never saw them before] and a first-rate commentary.

[deird1]

Thanks!

[next_to_normal]

I remember reading this a while ago, and enjoying it, but for some reason had absolutely no memory that it was yours... maybe because I wouldn't have expected Bander from you?

Just out of curiosity, what made you choose to include a non-canon pairing? I actually think a post-Chosen Bander pairing is pretty plausible, but the delight of this fic is the whimsical way you recount canon events.

[deird1]

I remember reading this a while ago, and enjoying it, but for some reason had absolutely no memory that it was yours... maybe because I wouldn't have expected Bander from you?

Heh. Generally not, no. It's not that I don't like the pairing, but I'd much rather have them both end up with someone else...


Just out of curiosity, what made you choose to include a non-canon pairing?

I'm not actually sure. It just seemed to fit.
The original prompt was for "pairings you've never done before" (at the time I'd never written any pairings except Tara/OC, so that was easy...), and I just ended up with this whole bunch of Buffy pairings - and, with the way it was structured, I really couldn't have her end up with one of the first four (if I could have, it would have been Spike, rather unsurprisingly). But putting Xander on the end seemed to make sense.

[angearia.livejournal.com]

I do enjoy reading your commentaries. I just read this fic (as you directed) before stepping in here and really enjoyed the whimsical tone. And reading the commentary, I also loved seeing all the structural resonance. It's very impressive to me how you pack so much symmetry into these works. I also liked how you put Angel and Spike on equal footing here.

Great work.

[deird1]

I'm glad you liked it!

[libco.livejournal.com]

I love these commentaries-it gives me a chance to go back and read your older stuff and love it!

[deird1]

Thanks! *grins*

[silveronthetree.livejournal.com]

This was awesome. Thank you.

Which are all things that happened when he didn’t have a soul

This is the part that I really loved about the Angel part - the most interesting thing about season 2 was that he did he never stop loving her.

Parker, who seems so wonderfully perfect on the surface
Ah! when I first read this, I got to this point and thought it was going to be about Riley. The assumption really threw me for a bit. I guess because she technically "met" Riley first and I'd entirely forgotten about Parker!

And I love the fact that Angel is a Man who isn't exactly a man but Spike is a Vampire who isn't etc. It reflects the difference in the way Buffy first met them, and I guess probably thought of them.

I also never say that Xander is in love with her…
I really didn't pick up on this... I think that makes me love it more.

[deird1]

I'm glad you enjoyed this!


I really didn't pick up on this... I think that makes me love it more.

Heh. I have... interesting views on Buffy/Xander...