A Tale Of Two Phonecalls

[deird_lj]

I just spent half an hour on the phone, trying desperately to get one sentence's worth of information out of my uni.

Here, for your amusement, is the gripping tale of my phonecall, as summarised in who-I-was-talking-to headings...


2:00 - "Future Students" office
The number was listed on the website, and it looked like the best option for what I was wanting to find out.
After hearing my explanation of the info I needed, the guy I was talking to transferred my call to...

2:01 - the Arts Faculty
An automated system, which gave me a whole bunch of options I didn't quite understand, and told me to pick the applicable one.
It then told me the option I picked was invalid, and hung up on me.

So I tried again.

2:03 - "General Enquiries" number
Once again, I explained the information I needed to find out.
The woman I spoke to was pretty sure she knew where I needed to go. So she transferred my call to...

2:04 - Student Services
Where I stayed on hold, listening to those "your call is important to us, really truly, we like you, stay on hold, don't hang up, we'll talk to you soon and we really mean it this time" recorded messages.
For twenty minutes.
Finally, someone answered, listened to my explanation (now becoming slightly briefer and more terse), and transferred me to...

2:25 - the Arts Research Facility
They spent a few minutes searching for my information on the computer system, then decided that I'd rung the wrong location, and transferred me to...

2:28 - the Arts Faculty
Yep. The same automated system that had previously hung up on me.
I decided to fool it, by picking a different option that still sounded vaguely okay.
That sent me through to...

2:29 - the dark depths of the Arts Faculty
Another recorded system. That had the option of talking to...

2:30 - the Switchboard
Where someone listened to my (very terse) explanation, and asked what faculty this was supposed to go through.
To which I said "The Arts faculty - but DON'T transfer me there again, PLEASE!"
So the nice lady promised she'd find me someone real, and instead transferred me to...

2:32 - the Arts Research Facility
As in the last group of people who had sent me to the automated system.
I headdesked, explained to the lady that, yes, this was the wrong place, but PLEASE, NOT THE ARTS FACULTY AGAIN - and she very kindly transferred me to...

2:34 - Coursework
Whereupon I explained, yet again, that:
"I've applied to do a course next year, and I just want to check that my application hasn't been lost."

Two seconds went past.
Then I got an answer: "No, it's not lost. I've got it right here."

...and I hung up the phone.


IT SHOULD NOT BE THIS COMPLICATED.

Comments

[klme.livejournal.com]

I really hate it when those automated things hang up on you. I remember ringing Centrelink, to hear: "For [option x], press (and then her automated voice disintergrated into tiny, tiny mumblings, impossible to hear properly, let alone understand), for [option y], press (more mumblings), for [option z], press (mumble mumble).
Every time I would try pressing a new number, hoping to randomly hit on the right number for [option y]. Every time it would say "I'm sorry, the number you have pushed is invalid. Goodbye." and hang up! So I'd ring again, wriggle through all the hoops needed to get to this particular menu, and try a different number. Aaaargh!

[kerithave.livejournal.com]

I once spent ages working my way through iPrimus' automated menu, not finding what I wanted (to close my account) eventually talked to someone in entirely the wrong department, who told me that I was talking to the wrong person but he would graciously transfer me, and then when I pointed out that there was no auto menu option to close my account, laughed and said that this was deliberate so that people would find it hard to close their accounts!! Do they seriously think people will just give up and say "ok, we will stick around then and keep on paying you money"....seriously auto-menus are the devil!

[danielrh.livejournal.com]

Actually, AOL had a phone system that was so famously hard to use that most dissatisfied customers had no way to cancel their accounts at all. Took years before they changed it to something less profitable.

[a2zmom.livejournal.com]

BWAH! Yes, this is a common problem all over of people having no idea of who knows/does what.

[rebcake.livejournal.com]

You know, it's experiences like these that lead to superb fics like Bureaucracy. Just sayin'.

Yes, I am the silver lining girl. Why do you ask?

[ib-stormcaller.livejournal.com]

There are ways to get autodumped onto a person from an automated call system... there are about 3 or 4 different methods, depending on the back end, and im trying to get the telstra guys "upgrading" our systems at work to detail them all to me :)

Generally hash is a good starting point tho.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_sabik_/]

Reportedly so is an inarticulate yell of rage... apparently some of them run frustration detection :-)

η

[ib-stormcaller.livejournal.com]

huh... none of the ones i know of, and definantly none of the most annoying ones...

Im just thankful we dont use voice recognition (much)

[lavastar.livejournal.com]

OUCH. That's a bummer. *hugs*

[next_to_normal]

Heh, I feel your pain. I was just told that I can't register for classes next semester because they don't have my immunization records, so now I am 1.) scrambling to get my records so I can register on time and 2.) boggling that they let me register for THIS semester without immunization records, but are now putting their foot down. Apparently, I can contaminate fall classes with my tuberculosis, but spring classes are off-limits.